Close Call..

Well, yesterday was not the exact day-before-Thanksgiving that I had planned.  Our little Hannah was coughing a lot on Tuesday.  She was up all night long (literally like 10 times) Tuesday night going in to Wednesday.  We decided at about 3:00am that Paul would take her to the walk in hours at 8:00am.  When I got Hannah up and started getting her dressed, I noticed her struggling to breath a bit, retractions in her stomach and neck from breathing, and some wheezing.  Respiratory distress.  Lovely.

Paul got to the Pediatrician's office.  They asked Hannah's symptoms.  They asked to see her belly and immediately pushed him up before the other 8 families already sitting in the waiting room.  The Dr. came back to see them and was concerned at how much Hannah was working to breathe.  They took her pulse oxygen level and it was 91.  Not good.  They did a breathing treatment, pulse ox still at 91, did another and it actually went down to 89.  Yep, Paul said he knew it was time.  They came in, took Paul and Hannah on the stretcher and off to Children's Hospital they went in the ambulance. 

On the other end of town, I'm sitting at home, with Ella and Hailee, about to lose my mind.  The wait to find out what was going on was bad enough.  Ella and I were in the middle of making some turkey cupcakes (Pinterest inspired, super cute, photos later) which I obviously had to put an end to.  I had to explain that someone had to come stay with them while mommy went and saw Hannah at the doctor with daddy.  That did not go well.  Ella started crying, screaming.  Then Hailee started crying.  The poor girls.  Help came to watch the girls and I was off.  I called a friend on the way to the hospital and thinking back on it now, she probably couldn't even understand me.  I was hysterical.

When I got to the hospital, Hannah was sitting there on Paul's lap.  Ok, this was not so bad.  If it were bad enough, she would be on oxygen (I guess she was on oxygen all the way in the ambulance).  She looked sleepy, and sick.  We went through meeting with the resident doctor, then another breathing treatment, then checking her levels more, then another treatment, then meeting with the attending doctor.  He said that she was looking much better, at this time she was playing on the bed, being her happy, silly self.  Her oxygen level was up to between 92 and 93 (still not great, they want it over 95) and her breathing was much slower with barely any retraction.  He agreed to let us go home after one more treatment.  YAY!  He said we seem to have a handle on things and what to look for in reasons to bring her back.  I sure didn't think once I got to the hosiptal we would be leaving so soon.  I didn't think it would be a two week stay like last time, but at least a shorter stay, maybe a few days or so like Hailee had last time.  The breathing treatments obviously helped.  We have an inhaler at home and are required to do them here once every four hours.  Hannah is also on some liquid breathing medication for the next four days.  Both doctors did say this is related to asthma.  She most likely already has it and these breathing problems are something we will have to deal with for the next few years with her.  The problems can come on fast, like they did yesterday, and can be mild or severe.  The thought of this happening over and over again makes my stomach turn.  *If you are wondering what I am meaning when I say "last time this happened", read this post from less than a year ago.

I just kept thinking to myself "Hannah cannot go through this again, I cannot go through this again, my family cannot go through this again".  I am thankful we are home.  It's been a rough week for other reasons as well and all I feel now is thankful.  Something somewhat major happens, and once again things are put into perspective. 

Today is Thanksgiving.  I hope everyone reading this is thankful for the love and family in their lives.  Life is way to precious to take for granted.  Give your kid an extra hug today, tell a family member you love them, and your spouse how much they mean to you.  I know I sound all wishy-washy right now, but hey, it's 5:30am and after yesterday's events all I can feel is thankful.  The Lord puts us in these situations for whatever reason, to make us stronger, to test us, to help us depend on Him.  Have a Happy Thanksgiving today.  I will post photos later of my girls in their ribbon turkey shirts I made them and some of my other Pinterest inspired crafts and food I've been working on.  *I have no idea where all of this creativity came from either.  But we've sure had a fun week or so preparing for this glorious day!



Our sweet girl in her hospital bed yesterday.

A big day for Hailee and Hannah!

This past Friday was Hailee and Hannah's 18 month (adjusted age) developmental assessment at Children's Hospital.  We have been doing these once every 6 months since they were born because of their prematurity.  The therapists and doctors like to keep up with them and make sure they are on track and don't need any type of therapy or assistance to help keep their development where it should be.  I had been anxiously nervous for the past few weeks about this appointment.  As I know they are moving along nicely, I was expecting some sort of speech therapy or some other area that they wouldn't be completely caught up with. 

The appointment was over two hours long.  The girls each worked with a therapist and did lots of different learning activities, fine motor skill work, and other testing to see where exactly they fall on the development scale.  Both girls ended up doing fabulous and both of them graduated from the program!  I was SO HAPPY, to say the least!  When we got their scores from the therapist and doctor, they were all outstanding.  They wanted them to be at the 21 month mark, which is their actual age versus their adjusted age at 18.5 months.  Both professionals agreed that they don't see a reason to have either girl come back for a follow up.  We have some things to watch for at they continue to grow, such as starting to put words together within the next 4 months or so, and that they start to read by about age 5.  As for now though, they are on track.  They have come so far in the past year and a half and they are just amazing!

Spending a morning at Children's really puts things into perspective.  When our baby girls were born, we didn't know where we'd be today.  I am so proud of our two little preemies!  We are so thankful and blessed for the life we have been given and for our beautiful, healthy girls. 

High five in the waiting room!

Ok, that was enough.  Get me out of here!

The girl's graduation certificates :)

RSV

Well, our trip to Disney was cut short because Hannah and Hailee got sick at home.  My parents had them for the long weekend.  Mom knew something with Hannah's breathing was not right on Sunday morning.  Let's go back for a sec...Friday morning (Ella and I flew out Friday at 7:00am.) both girls woke up with a fever.  Mom gave them Tylenol, babied them a bit, watched them closely.  Saturday they were fussy, congested, and started a cough.  Sunday when they got up from their morning nap, Mom said something had changed with Hannah's breathing.  She seemed to be struggling for air.  I told her to go ahead and take them to the ED at Children's Hospital here in Columbus.  Paul and I then started our long day of calling airlines, trying to find early flights home, and waiting standby at the airport. 

Hannah was admitted to the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) right away.  They observed Hailee for a while and decided to admit her too.  She wasn't nearly as bad as Hannah, so she went to a regular floor.  I arrived at the hospital Sunday evening.  Poor Hannah was put on bi-pap (you may remember they were both on c-pap in the NICU when they were born.  This device was similar).  It was a full face mask and she hated it.  She had these big IV arms and just kept smashing them into the mask and crying.  It was heart breaking seeing her so miserable.  Hailee was put on nasal cannula, given a little bit of oxygen, and had scheduled breathing treatments every four hours.  She could sit up, play with toys, and be held.  Hannah could not do any of these things.  The bi-pap was not helping Hannah enough.  On Monday, she was intubated.  I was devastated.  I had run home for a quick second to shower for the first time since Disney (gross, I know).  Paul called me on my way back to the hospital and said they were going to have to intubate her.  I hurried as fast as I could to see her once more before she was put out.  By the time I got there, Paul was in the waiting room and said it was already in process.  Her breathing was so bad, they could not wait.  I had break down #47 or so of the week.  I just couldn't handle it.  How could she have to be intubated AGAIN?!  My girls already went through this less than a year ago!!! 

Hannah was now on a paralytic to keep her completely paralyzed and calm so that her lungs would work and start to heal.  She looked like a completely lifeless baby laying there.  It was so awful, I cannot even explain.  I never thought I would say this is a million years, but this experience has been even worse than the NICU was.  Our girls are older now, have their own personalities, and should not be laying there like this.  This was now their second Valentine's Day in a row that they were hospitalized.

Both girls tested positive for RSV.  Unbelievable that all of this to an adult, or older child is JUST A COLD!  They could've gotten it from anyone with the mildest stuffy nose or cough.  It takes a different toll on different people.  Hannah and Hailee both have the same virus, but have apparently taken different paths.  The girls are not more likely to get RSV because of their prematurity, but they are more likely to have severe cases of the virus because of their little premature lungs.

On Wednesday morning, they tried to wean Hannah from her paralytic.  She lasted about four hours, starting moving a couple fingers and toes, got extremely agitated, and it all went down hill from there.  She started having desaturations, and couldn't tolerate it.  I'm talking monitors beeping all around, doctors converging, the type of thing you see on TV.  Paul and I are just standing there bedside in the midst of about ten people, feeling helpless.  She was quickly put back on her paralytic, and all of her vent settings that were turned down were turned back up.  As you can imagine, break down #74 occurred by her mama.

Hailee was getting better.  She was getting back to her normal, high maintenance self...wanting to be held and snuggled all the time.  Paul and I slept at the hospital every night.  One in Hannah's room and one in Hailee's.  Poor Ella...she comes home from a fun time in Disney and then mom, dad, and her sister's all just disappear for a few days. 

On Thursday Hannah was finally weaned from her paralytic.  This was a huge step, as it is the first thing that had to be done before any vent settings could be lowered.  She got a fever once on Thursday and once on Friday.  That extremely agitates her.  She gets all uncomfortable, moving around everywhere, which generally sets off the monitors.  It is best if she is calm so that the medications and machines can do their work.  She is still extremely sedated, and will be until she is extubated, but you have to be sedated with a huge tube down your throat.  Her hands are tied to the bedside so that she can't grab the tube. 

Hailee was released Friday.  She is home now and doing fine.  Once again, we were leaving Hannah at the hospital and her sister got to go home before her.  It's the same feeling as the NICU...happy one is coming home but devastating leaving one there.  Paul and I now have been taking turns staying at the hospital every other night.  One at home with Hailee and Ella and one at the hospital with Hannah. 

Hannah is now doing a little bit better.  She hasn't had any episodes in the past 48 hours, so her vent settings are SLOWLY starting to come down.  They will work more on weaning her today.  They originally told me that kids like her are vented from RSV for about 5-10 days.  Today is her 6th day.  I am hoping she can be extubated by Tuesday.  No one has said that, but I'm just guessing.  Of course if she has any more setbacks, that time frame will change. 

Once my girls are home, we will be doing NOTHING outside of our house until RSV season is long gone.  I am not taking any chances.  RSV season is SO bad this year.  They say it is worse because the weather has been so warm and nothing has frozen.  About one third of the kids in the PICU are in there with RSV.  It is extremely sad.  Every room you walk by, the child is intubated.  No one is allowed on any floor at Children's right now during RSV season.  The only people that we have seen are my parents, our pastor (He has come to pray with us every day.  He is a good, good man.), and our one friend that is a nurse in the ED at the hospital.  RSV is a big deal.  We are proof that it can really take a toll on little ones.  And again, RSV is just a common cold in any healthy adult or older child.  It's so scary.  I will now be that nervous, neurotic, disinfecting, crazy-cleaning lady that I was right when the girls came home when they were born.  We won't be able to go to church, the grocery, the mall, or half the other places we normally go.  I feel bad for poor Ella.  She hates being inside all the time.  I am going to have to come up with more fun things to do indoors for a while. 

Please keep praying for both of our girls to get completely better.  Pray that Hannah can soon be weaned from her vent and that the Lord brings comfort and strength to her.  It is so important that she stays calm and is comfortable.  If you know our feisty little Hannah, you know that she is anything but calm.  She is ever-moving and restless.  This is not so good in the type of setting she is in.  We are so thankful for our support system and group of prayer warriors.  I know our little girl will come out of this, it is just such a slow process.  Please pray for Paul and I to have utmost hope and trust in our Lord during this time.  It is hard at times to keep the faith with so many setbacks.  We are trying hard.  I know that the Lord will not give me anything I cannot handle...but really, how much does He think I can handle?!  Going through all of this once was horrible, and going through it a second time is just unimaginable. 

Below is a video of Hailee in the hospital.  Friends of ours sent balloons and a bear to each girl.  I took this video to send to her but thought I would share since it is cute!

Hailee, trying to break free!

I don't have any photos of Hannah, but trust me, you would not want to see any right now :(